A Story That Mirrors Too Many Others
When Maya first met her partner, his constant texts and calls felt flattering. He said he wanted to make sure she was safe, so she worried him when she didn’t answer quickly.
Over time, that worry became overbearing control. He demanded her passwords, checked her messages, and insisted on having her location at all times. When she pushed back on his invasions of her privacy, his tone changed. Arguments escalated into shouting, and then, into physical violence. He apologized, promising it would never happen again. When Maya woke up the next morning, he had changed her phone password so that only he had access to her phone. He continued to demand her passwords and access her technology. What began as emotional manipulation turned into a system of digital surveillance and control that followed her everywhere.
Escape That Wasn’t Freedom
After months of abuse, Maya left for good. She moved to a new apartment, changed her number, and told only close friends where she was living. The first few weeks brought a sense of relief and peace. This was until certain events made her stomach tighten.
Her new address appeared in a shopping app she hadn’t used since she left. Her car’s GPS history listed routes she hadn’t driven. Her phone battery drained faster than ever before. When a friend helped her search her devices, hidden beneath a folder was a tracking app transmitting her location every few minutes. Her car’s Bluetooth system was still paired with her ex’s account. Even her doorbell camera was registered under his email. She had left him, but he hadn’t left her.
Technology as an Extension of Power
Tragically, Maya’s experience is a common experience. According to the National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV), 97 percent of U.S. domestic violence response programs report helping survivors who have experienced technology-enabled abuse. Nearly one in four women in the United States will experience severe intimate-partner violence in their lifetime, and more than half of those survivors say their abuser used technology to stalk, monitor, or harass them.
From GPS tags to compromised data cloud accounts, hacked cameras, and constant messaging, abusers are transforming everyday technological tools into weapons of control. Technology removes the limits of distance, allowing control to continue long after a survivor leaves the physical relationship.
The Escalating Risk
For Maya, separation only intensified the danger. Her ex created fake social media accounts to monitor her online activity, sent threatening emails, and left notes on her car windshield. The harassment was relentless, designed to remind her that he could still find her.
Research shows that the period immediately after leaving is the most dangerous time for survivors. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reports that over half of all women murdered in the United States are killed by current or former partners, most commonly within months of ending the relationship.
When abusers gain access to a survivor’s digital information, that risk skyrockets. The Pew Research Center found that one-third of women under 35 have faced online harassment, and women are twice as likely as men to fear for their physical safety as a result. For women of color, LGBTQIA+ survivors, and those with disabilities, the threat compounds. These groups more heavily rely on technology to stay safe in communities or even regulate health issues. Technology designed to simplify life can instead expose every movement, every message, and every moment of vulnerability.
Maya stopped posting online and avoided family and friends out of fear of putting them at risk. She started scarcely carrying her phone when she left her house out of fear it was being tracked. When she brought it, each vibration made her heart pound out of her chest. She felt trapped in her own life, as though her abuser was in every space she ran to.
From Risk to Tragedy—and a Call to Action
Weeks later, Maya didn’t show up for work. When the police arrived at her apartment, they found her dead. Her former partner had used location data from her phone to find her and murder her.
Though Maya is fictional, her story reflects patterns seen across the country. The Violence Policy Center reports that approximately three women are murdered by current or former intimate partners every day in the United States. These numbers represent women like Maya, whose deaths could have been prevented with a quick, united response.
Tech companies must build safety into design: location sharing should default to private; devices should alert users to tracking, and survivor-specific support must be standard. Lawmakers must modernize anti-stalking and privacy laws, fully fund digital-safety programs through the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), and ensure that police and courts treat digital abuse as part of a pattern of escalation, not as a side issue. The private sector and lawmakers must work together to codify protections and make resources easy to use and locate in a high stress situation such as Maya’s.
Maya’s story is not inevitable — it’s a warning. We can build technology that protects people, instead of allowing it to be used to control survivors. We can pass laws that defend instead of delaying justice until it’s too late. If technology can be turned into a weapon, it can also be forged into armor. Because when lives are at stake, every device, every policy, and every choice matters. The question is whether we’ll choose to forge it.
Accounting Intern Lilly Mallinckrodt
References
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2017, July 18). Racial and ethnic differences in homicides of adult women and the role of intimate partner violence – united states, 2003–2014. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/66/wr/mm6628a1.htm
Huecker, M. R. (2023, April 9). Domestic violence. StatPearls [Internet]. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK499891/
Koziol-McLain, J., Webster, D., & Campbell, J. (2011, October 10). Risk factors for femicide in abusive relationships: Results from a multisite case control study | AJPH | Vol. 93 issue 7. American Journal of Public Health. https://ajph.aphapublications.org/doi/10.2105/AJPH.93.7.1089
Net, S., Net/, S., Lee, K., & Lee/, K. (2018, September 14). Safety net project. https://www.techsafety.org/blog/tag/NNEDV+survey
Technology-facilitated stalking behaviors. (n.d.). https://www.stalkingawareness.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/Technology-Facilitated-Stalking-SLII-Behaviors.pdf
Vogels, E. A. (2021, January 13). 1. personal experiences with online harassment. Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2021/01/13/personal-experiences-with-online-harassment/
When men murder women in the United States. Violence Policy Center. (2024, May 28). https://vpc.org/when-men-murder-women-united-states/